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Who should pay for the bill when going out on a date , the man or the woman or go dutch (AA)?

Though I would say that most people would answer that it should be the man.
As I have observed in different cultures around the globe basically from watching literally thousands of movies and reading thousands of books, my guess would be that the majority would say that it is the man who should pay the bill when going out on a date.

I am curious what Shenzhenstuff members would say.
In today's world when the opportunities for both men and women are roughly equal, it could be fair to say that going dutch is the right solution. Considering that the modern woman has always been advocating for women's liberation and equality.

Consider the following scenarios;
1. A man asks a girl out to an affordable restaurant (maybe about 30 to 50rmb a meal) but the girl refuses and suggests that they go to a more expensive one (about 100 to 200 per meal).
Even though a guy could not refuse a woman she likes and eventually agrees, the woman senses the man's reluctance especially when it is time to pay the bill. Even after a very wonderful dinner date, with a very good conversation, the  woman decides not to meet the man ever again.

2. A woman asks a man out for dinner several times, and the man pays for the bill all the time. The girl never even offers. Eventually, the guy likes the girl and proposes that they go steady. The girl refuses saying that they are not compatible, and that they are just meant to be friends. The girl continues to ask the man out saying that she likes to hang out with him. More often than not, she would even bring her friends along. And, of course, the man pays the bill.

3. A man asks a girl out but she says she is too busy to go out. After 3 months, the girl decides to accept the man's invitation and suggests that they go to Disneyland. The girl clearly says that she will bring her friend with her and that the man should be paying for the entrance fees. (entrance fee is about 350 per person). That also means the guy pays for everything else like the taxi fare, lunch and dinner, etc.

4. A man asks a woman he met online for a dinner date. The woman lives about 2 hours away and only agrees if the man goes to her location. The man agrees only if the woman will treat the man for dinner even just at McDonald's or KFC. The woman agrees without hesitation and says they should set a date within the week. Unfortunately after that, the woman has never replied to any text message nor answered any call. 
In most cases, a woman would disagree and outright say, "in your dreams". 

There are hundreds of different scenarios and I would love to hear about other people's experiences, both men and women. 
If men are to pay the bill, and women just collect and select, multiply this a thousand fold, a guy needs to spend his entire life savings in his pursuit of finding the right woman. That is considering the average pay in this part of the world is only 1,500 rmb per month even for a university graduate. 
No wonder a property developer once made an ad saying, "An apartment is more reliable than a man." - 房子比男人可靠。

In some rare instances, I have met some women who insist that we go dutch. Probably one in a thousand, it is meeting one in several years. 


Tags: AA, bill, date, dinner, dutch, equality, expensive, liberation, man, pay, More…restaurant, woman

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1. A man asks a girl out to an affordable restaurant (maybe about 30 to 50rmb a meal) but the girl refuses and suggests that they go to a more expensive one (about 100 to 200 per meal).
I would still pay but I will not see her again. If I'm rich I wouldn't mind paying all the time.

2. A woman asks a man out for dinner several times....
Your action is your responsibility, there is no assurance that when you say I love you, the girl will acknowledge it too. There are more women that have been played than men being played. If she said no and you still do favors because your still hoping then you've experience "Love is Blind" first hand.

3. A man asks a girl out but she says she is too busy to go out. After 3 months...
This analogy is flawed unless money is not an issue it is just plain stupid to tag along or even talk to the girl.

4. A man asks a woman he met online for a dinner date...
I don't know but certainly I won't be surprise.

Since I'm old school I would definitely pay, willingly every time. But I will only invite her to a place which I can afford and maybe from time to time treat her to someplace special not necessarily uber-expensive but to make her feel that she is special.

If both men and women have sense and sensibility there would be a defined line of what is to expect with each other. Money should never be an issue as long as dating is concerned within what is defined as normal. Certainly if Men wants sex only, wouldn't you think it's fair if Women would look for their interest as well?

If men are to pay the bill, and women just collect and select, multiply this a thousand fold, a guy needs to spend his entire life savings in his pursuit of finding the right woman.
Don't you think she's worth it?
agreed with Becz,that is Go dutch before marriage,even u two are on a date,fair enough.....
Thats why men should beware of MEAL-digger and WINE/BEER-digger ! :D
Personally if I ask a girl out I will pay the bill no matter where we go - if I know the restuarant is going to be too dear for me to afford I will find a way out of going to that restuarant.
As for question 3 - if a girl thinks for a first date she is getting taken to disneyland WITH a friend and I have to pay everything then she will not be getting to go on any dates with me.
Answering the question :

1. If the girl thinks that the guy would just be later on tag as a "common" friend, she then should give her share whenever and wherever.
2. If the girl has no intention of going into a relationship with the guy, after several dates or simply going out to meet in coffee shop, the girl should start practicing to open her bag, to get her wallet, to unbutton/unzip her wallet, to pick-up some RMB/HKD and give her share of the bill.
3. For culture and practice reason, wherein its accustomed that it is the guy to fully pay for the bill, and he insists to pay for it, then the girl is not oblige then to give her share. Then again, they should refer to the "Item number 1" I mentioned earlier.

Somehow, some girls measure the financial stability of the man through the liquidity and capability being shown on dates.

Guys simply hv to remember that there is no abuser, if there is no one to be abused. :D
Poor man, oftentimes playing women but much more oftentimes (if there's such a phrase) played by women.

Being that I've worked all my life and have always paid for things I consumed or at least gave my fair share in everything, I can only say one thing for this kind of women, shameless users. But then again, us breeds are not the same - samoyed, border collies, or street dogs...
If you go out once as friends pay. If you go out as possible love interest, make a move. If she wants you, okay. If she doesn't, well, pay, but don't go out again. I don't have female friends that I go out and eat with for no reason, except at work, in which case everybody pays for themselves or as a group. I can't imagine regularly inviting a woman to eat with me and paying for it for no good reason at all. I don't see why this is an issue.
I have been living in China for about 6 years now , and have dated countless of times. Unfortunately, only about 5 women have offered to go dutch or AA.
For me, I would be more than willing to pay for the dinner date especially the first time, but it would really be nice to know that a woman would offer to pay her share of the bill. It is the thought that counts.
You know, I was thinking the same fucking thing. AA is something the Chinese created to "split" the bill. Kind of like how Chinese created golf cause they found an L shaped stick and round or oval shaped rocks in the ground aged 1000's of years old, HAH.
She means that ;
In Mandarin Chinese, the appropriate term is "AA制 (AA zhì)," where zhì is the Chinese word for "system". Explanations vary: "AA" could stand for "Algebraic Average" or "Acting Appointment".
Possibly "arithmetic average" or, for those more exciting evenings, "ack-ack" [anti-aircraft guns].
"AA制 (AA zhì)

Yes, 'AA jai' in Cantonese. You hear it in HK all the time :-)

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